Monday, September 2, 2013

Idolizing Your Marriage

This holiday weekend, I got a chance to look at our wedding scrap book. It was one of the millions of projects I took on while planning for my DIY wedding, and even though I barely got it ready in time for the wedding, it's the project that I enjoy the most now.

I had several thoughts as I thumbed through the pages:

1. Wow, I really did a good job! (This was my first official scrapping project)
2. Wow, this scrapbook still needs a lot of work. (The cover is un-decorated and there are several things left out.
3. Wow, that was some engagement and courtship. (It lasted two years.)
4. Wow, we look really great.

That last thought is the thought that always sticks with me when I look at that book. Although we had a lot of obstacles to overcome as an interracial (black/white), ethnically diverse (Caribbean/Hispanic) and interfaith (Protestant/Catholic) couple, we truly have a great marriage right now. We are supporting each other at school and work, we're working together at home and we've even worked things out so we can go the same church.

We're happy. But that's were things get tricky. It's so easy to then go and put my marriage on a pedestal and gush to friends how great everything is without any regard to their feelings. Or, maybe give those pity eyes to people who are single and seeking. Or, quickly dismiss those who are experiencing hard times in their relationships as not doing it right because after all, look at my great marriage!

C'mon. We all hated that chick when we were single and struggling with our relationships. Let's not become her.

While I was looking at that scrapbook this weekend, I had a fifth thought: Wow, God really blessed us. Looking at the pictures of us dating, meeting each other's parents, and going through pre-marital counseling, I realized that I could have never put things together as well as God did and is doing. God helped us bridge the centuries-old Protestant/Catholic divide without killing each other. God gave us favor with each other's parents. God gave us a wonderful wedding. God is helping us cope with each other's crazy work schedules. God is giving us a sense of humor and patience when things are really tense.

Looking at that scrapbook, I saw God's handiwork and that's what I want to put on pedestal.

How has God blessed your marriage?

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